Two Calendars

Same, and putting the mat on the floor the night before is the highest-leverage thing I've ever done for a morning habit.

If your machine has adjustable presser foot pressure but you can't find it, check the manual for a dial on top of the shank or under the top cover. Mine was a screw I'd assumed was structural for two years.

Before, and it isn't close. The lease is what turns an informal arrangement into a legal one, and "barely affordable" plus "never discussed" is how people end up somewhere they resent.

It doesn't need to be a summit. One evening, three questions: what do we each put in, proportional or equal, and what happens if one of us has a bad six months. Write the answer down somewhere you'll both find it again.

Doing it before you fall in love with a specific flat also stops the number becoming a referendum on that flat.

The 21:45 alarm has done more in four days than three weeks of removing objects. Slightly annoying.

That's probably fair. Work has been heavy since March and I hadn't connected the two at all.

Say what you want instead is the bit I was missing. I'd rehearsed the complaint about six times and had nothing after it.

Fair and slightly uncomfortable question. I think it's mostly the joke. Mostly.

The pre-defined restart is underrated. When I've missed a week the paralysis is entirely about what the first session back should be, and having one written down removes it.

Change what you're doing before you change the friendship.

Stop holding the evening. Say yes, and also make a fallback plan you'd be happy with, so a cancellation costs you nothing. Then shift to things that are cheap to cancel: a walk, a coffee near their place, something in a slot you'd be out for anyway.

Separately, and once, say the plain thing. "The last few plans have fallen through late and I've stopped counting on them, is something going on?" Said without heat that's a question rather than an accusation, and their answer tells you which friendship you actually have now.

The he-should-say-it part is doing a lot of work. Every version of this I've seen where the partner delivers the message to their own in-law goes better, no matter how kindly the other one phrases it.

Same conclusion at my last place. The tell was that every incident review had a line saying staging didn't have this data. After the fourth one we stopped pretending.

Shoulders, bust, waist, sleeves. I've been doing them in whatever order the problem shouted loudest, which explains a lot.

Fourteen months and no fights is the part I'd look at, honestly. Not because fighting is good, but because most couples have found a couple of real disagreements by then. If you've both been avoiding them, the flatness might be that rather than the timeline.

Five weeks is early, and nightly habits are slower than morning ones because your evening is more variable: different times, different tiredness, sometimes not even home. Morning habits automate faster almost entirely because the context is more consistent.